We all know the answer to “Why did the Chicken cross the Road?,” right? I have read this before... and it had brought tears to my eyes and pain in my tummy. So I encourage you to read.
To get to the other side has been carefully considered by these famous people:
Moses, 1300 BC: Know ye that it is unclean to eat the chicken that has crossed the road, and that the chicken that crosseth the road doth so for its own preservation.
Julius Caesar, 47 BC: veni, vidi, vici (I come, I see, I conquer)
Mrs. Thomas Paine, 1776 AD: Out of common sense.
George Washington, 1776 AD: Actually, the chicken crossed the Delaware with me back in 1776. But most history books don’t reveal this where I created the first chicken soup!
Einstein, 1905 AD: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference and your relative speed!
Mrs. Sigmund Freud, 1926 AD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying secret sexual insecurity.
Mrs. Pablo Picasso, 1938 AD: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken is an Abstract of my Art!
Gilligan, 1964 AD : The traffic started getting rough; the chicken had to cross. If not for the plumage of its peerless tail the chicken would be lost, the chicken would be lost!
Captain James T. Kirk, Stardate -357687.2 (1966): To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
Howard Cosell, 1970 AD: It may very well have been one of the most astonishing events to grace the annals of history. An historic, unprecedented avian biped with the temerity to attempt such an herculean achievement formerly relegated to homo sapiens pedestrians is truly a remarkable occurrence.
Richard M. Nixon, 1973 AD: The chicken never crossed my crooked road and for the record,“I am not a crook!”
Roseanne Barr, 1988 AD: Burrrrrp. What chicken?
George H. W. Bush, 1991 AD: To face a kinder, gentler thousand points of headlights.
Bill Clinton, 1998 AD: I have no recollection of exposing myself to this chicken, although the chicken may have crossed the road to examine my normal grooming techniques after removing my pants!
George W. Bush, 2005 AD: The fact that the chicken has been able to cross the road with impunity despite my UN resolutions, is an affront to Democracy, liberty and justice!
Speedy Buddhacat, 2008 AD: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.
Well, too much laughing can bring tears to ones eyes and sometimes it can give one a tummy pain, right? That's what I meant. have a good laugh, pips.